Memory 5

[malignstar]

A younger Felix, possibly around 8, sits at a table in a room with bright yellow walls and motivational posters plastered to practically every surface. There's an equally eye-assaulting bright blue bookshelf filled with books and rugs shaped like various grinning animals. The room's appearance contrasts violently with Felix's current state. His right eye is ringed in a slightly purplish blue bruise, his upper lip is busted and crusted with blood and he has multiple cuts all over his face, the result of rocks flung in his direction. One had particularly found its mark near his left temple, now covered in a reddened bandage. Similar stained bandages can be found on both his hands, wrapped around his upper knuckles and the first joint of his fingers.

He stares angrily at a chipper lion on the floor, as he rubs at the bandages on his right hand. They didn't even bother to tell him how long he would have to stay this time. He imagines forever after what they say he did. Only he doesn't remember doing any of it.

He runs the tip of his tongue over his still sore lip, as tears start to well up in his eyes. It's been hours since he's seen anyone. It's as if the home staff had shuffled him into the room, ignoring his desperate protests and going on about 'thinking about what he'd done' and 'figuring out how to deal with this situation,' and then vanished.

"It's not my fault," he sobs to the empty room. "I don't know what happened to those jerks."

"They deserved what they got." The clipped voice comes from behind him. But when he jerks his head to see who's talking, there's nobody there.

"Who, who's that?" Felix shrinks a bit in his chair, looking around him. It's not that he's scared. It's just weird, that's all.

"Forgotten me already? After I took care of those beastly children for you." The voice is familiar in a way he can't quite understand. It also sounds vaguely distorted, as if he can't really concentrate on it enough to do much aside from catch the words. "You looked as though you needed some help."

Felix sits up again, his eyes widening. "I heard you before. You called them bullies." He tries to turn around in his chair again. "Why can't I see you?"

"You are not ready. It might be confusing for you." There's a sense of reluctance in the voice's tone, maybe even a bit of frustration. Neither makes much sense to Felix.

"Why?"

"It's hard to explain."

"I'm smart. I bet I can understand."

"I am sure you are. But I do not wish to frighten you." A strained calm.

Felix climbs out of his chair and folds his arms. "I'm not scared either. Let me see you."

"Another time, perhaps. You have enough to sort through." The voice speaks with a clipped finality. It picks up again before Felix can argue, "I am only speaking to you now because I want you to understand you did nothing wrong. It is your right to defend yourself if someone is hurting you."

"But I didn't do anything. I didn't hit anyone," Felix speaks adamantly. He doesn't know how he hurt his hands. Why won't anyone believe him?

"You didn't. I did."

"What?" Felix yelps. He suddenly feels furious at the mysterious voice. That's the person everyone wants, not him! "You have to tell them you did it! Everyone's mad at me. They won't let me see Mira."

"I can't. They would not be able to understand." As if sensing Felix's next question, the voice quickly continues, "It will take too long to explain right now, but I had no choice. Those boys would have hurt you."

Felix jerks his head down and rubs at his bandaged hands again. Flashes of what had occurred before that staff had discovered him (standing confused in the center of the yard, while his two tormentors wailed and held hands to their bloody faces) cools his anger. "They called me a freak. They said something's wrong with my eyes."

"Nothing is wrong with your eyes." The voice sounds firm but somewhat sad, regretful.

"Noone else has red ones. I hate them." Felix starts to scratch at his wrappings, getting more upset. If it wasn't for his stupid eyes, maybe someone would actually want to adopt him. Tamira too since she refused to go anywhere without him.

"Nothing is wrong with your eyes," the voice is more insistent this time. "Listen to me, if something like this ever happens again, I will be there. I won't let anyone hurt you. I promise you that."

"But what if you're far away?" Felix blurts out without meaning to.

"I won't be. I... I have magic." The response is too rushed to be wholly believed.

Felix feels his face shape into a frown. "Magic isn't real. It's only in movies."

"You have to trust me. I helped you this time, did I not?"

He doesn't know how to argue with that. He doesn't even know how this invisible person helped him before. Maybe they really do have magic. How else could they make themselves invisible? Even if he wishes they wouldn't right now. It's creepy talking to someone he can't see.

Felix plops back onto the chair. "I want to see Mira. Can you help me leave?"

"That I cannot do. If I help you, the staff will be even angrier. They might not let you see your sister for a long time. You have to stay here until they return."

"But I didn't do anything!" Felix slams a fist onto the table. "If you're my friend, you have to help me! It's your fault they're mad at me!"

The voice doesn't respond this time.

Felix scrambles out of his chair and starts looking around again. "Hey, where did you go? Don't leave." He suddenly feels entirely too alone, and he can feel the sobs building in his throat. "Come back..."

"Remember what I said. It's a promise." The voice seems more distant now, as if scarcely more than a whisper by his ear. But its return still calms Felix and he nods slowly.

"Don't go again, okay"

"I won't. But we won't be able to talk for a while. The magic only lasts so long." The voice is getting harder to hear, as if fading. "You will have to keep this a secret. From everyone. Or the spell won't work again. Do you understand?"

"But Mira..." How can this person ask him to keep secrets from his sister? They've always shared everything. They're all each other has.

"Even her. It is very delicate, very special magic."

Felix considers this. If he didn't get hurt all the time, Tamira wouldn't be so worried. She could be happy. He wants her to be happy. More than anything.

"If I keep it a secret, I won't get hurt anymore?"

"You have my word. I will not allow anyone to hurt you. I will help you."

Felix touches one of the cuts on his face, lingering on it before finally answering softly. "I won't tell anyone."

There's no response from the voice, but Felix can't help feeling that his promise was accepted just the same.